Jan

13

A Little Perspective Never Hurts

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So the boy slept in his crib last night. In the other room. Away from me. Are you getting where I'm going with this?

Well, you might think that my husband would have had a clue when I wimpered something like, "my baaaabeeee is all the way in the other room in his crib." The Swede, who is unbelievably caring and thoughtful most of the time, attempted to comfort me by saying, "You know, some day he will move out of our house."

Um, thanks a million for clarifying that for me.

I suppose he has a point. But still.

I've been waiting for this day since we brought him home. A time to sleep uninterrupted by baby gurgles, breath-y sighs, and other such noises that are oh-so-cute until you are the worried mother with this itty bitty noise machine in your face. All. Night. Long. But last night, I found myself curled up in the bed missing those exact noises and the feeling that that my whole little family was within inches of me. It's crazy how time flies, and how it is so easy to get caught up in what is next. You forget how fast the craziness-of-now could become the sweetness-of-yesterday. And these last 4.5 months have been so crazy, and yet so heavenly sweet. I wish I could master seeing the sweetness in the daily craziness, but that's always been a struggle for me.

Of course, it shouldn't be hard at all after reading this ultimate love letter to a wife. It's a blog about a family interrupted; written by a dad who was left raising his baby girl alone after his wife unexpectedly dies 27 hours after giving birth. Not exactly an uplifting topic, but the posts are not only a beautiful ode to the man's wife and daughter, but also a reminder for all of us to be thankful for everything and everyone we have at this very moment.

And so I am. Thankful, that is, for my beautiful family including the feisty little one sleeping in the crib all the way in the other room.

Dec

24

Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas!

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Christmas Toy

Merry Christmas to all!

Dec

21

Breastfeeding, Bottles, and Pumping Oh My!

Filed Under Baby Land, Breastfeeding | 1 Comment

Last week at the nursing mothers group (North of Boston and need help with breastfeeding? Run, do.not.walk to Winchester Hospital's Outpatient Lactation Center) that the boy and I attend, there was a mom of a 6 day old baby. 6 Days? 6 Days. I think back to my 6th day postpartum, and there wasn't even a chance that I got dressed much less packed the baby up and schleped anywhere. But, I digress.

This new mom shared with us her concern that her current feeding routine was not something she could maintain. That the feeding and the pumping were running into each other. The ladies of the group heard the desperation in her voice. I felt her desperation. Beginning about my second week postpartum,  I began working with a lactation consultant to try to rectify my low milk supply. Baby would get fed on demand, and since my lad goes from 0 to 60 in about a second, that would begin with a, shall we say, a very loud "shout-out." The process went a little something like this:

Shout-out
Breastfeed Left for 5 minutes or until there was no more swallowing
Breastfeed Right for 5 minutes or until there was no more swallowing
Supplement Baby with Bottle
Burp Baby
Change Baby's Diaper
Put Baby Down for a nap (please, PLEASE sleep little one)
Pump both breasts with a hospital-grade pump
Wash bottles and pump paraphernalia
I would be lucky to get all of that done before, guess what...
Here comes another shout-out.
Rinse. Repeat.

And this would go on all.day.long. and oh, don't forget, all.night.long. I felt like I couldn't find even the tiniest moment for even the simplest of tasks. You know, like eating and going to the bathroom. I felt like it was a never ending process, and I was convinced that it couldn't be maintained.

After the group was over, I talked with the new mom. I told her everything I wished I had been told. I told her that I knew that "it's going to get better" offers little comfort to a new mom when you've been up all night, haven't eaten, have a baby screaming for a feeding, and you need, you know, to just pee.

My advice? First of all, pee. Everything is easier without a bladder that is about to explode. Junior can wait 30 seconds for a feeding. Second, it will get better, but since those words mean nothing at the moment, just focus on getting through to the next feeding. Thinking about keeping up the schedule is too overwhelming. It will get easier. Baby will learn. Mom will learn. The pumping will end. No one continues to pump after every feeding forever. Buy a hands free pumping bra. While you won't be able to do a jig while pumping, it gives you the option of being able to calm the baby by touch while you are pumping. Get enough bottle supplies and breastpump supplies that you only have to wash once a day. This is a key. The investment will be so worth it especially if you get dishwasher safe items. Best of all, the whole point of this craziness is to increase the milk supply. If it works, you eliminate nearly all of the steps. Last piece of advice. Find someone that understands. Well meaning friends and family can make you mental mainly because they don't understand what you are experiencing. Find a new mom's breastfeeding group or visit web communities like kellymom.com or MOBI.

My overwhelming feeling after leaving that group was that in fact the best piece of advice that "it will get better," is in fact the one thing that I didn't want to hear in the midst of it. Kind of funny if you think about it. But, oy vey, am I glad that part of parenthood is over.

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